Paulie O'Byrne. BlackburnNews.com file photo.Paulie O'Byrne. BlackburnNews.com file photo.
London

London's Paulie O’Byrne Calls Off Stickhandling Journey

A Mount Forest-native's stickhandling journey to raise money and awareness of mental illness has come to an end.

Paulie O’Byrne announced on his blog that, due to “unforeseen medical problems and circumstances,” there will be no tour this summer.

The 30-year-old planned to stickhandle from Victoria, British Columbia to St. John’s, Newfoundland to raise money for the charity 1in5. However, the Londoner called off the cross-country tour in May after injuries and illness sustained in British Columbia forced him to return to Ontario for proper medical attention.

An abbreviated trip from Thunder Bay to Ottawa was later scheduled but effectively cancelled with the blog post on Friday.

“I am discouraged and pained to tell you all that maybe this just isn't time for me to do this,” The former hockey player wrote, “The mental, emotional and physical impact of the tour I started and had to stop has taken its toll on me but helped me to make another difficult decision. There will be no tour this summer. It's with an extremely heavy heart that I make this decision. Feasibly it just won't work this year.”

The former hockey coach left Victoria on May 10, only to be sidelined three days later with a knee injury. After a two-week rehabilitation in Delta, O’Byrne hit the road again. However, the former hockey player was soon hit with bleeding ulcers and acid reflux and called off the cross-country journey on May 28 through another blog post.

“I can tell everyone I'm not in a good spot in my life right now. The depression I live with is stirring and I am having a hard time after I promised so much to you all,” O'Byrne wrote on Friday.

O'Byrne played competitive hockey for 14 years but suffered from clinical depression, anxiety, drug addiction, suicide attempts and post-traumatic stress disorder.

The blog post can be read below, or on his blog.

I have put a lot of pressure on myself. Turns out my own body has said “no”. I have to have more medical tests. I have poured everything into creating an environment for everyone to come together and feel comfortable to share their personal stories of #StrengthFromPain. A lot of people have invested a lot of time and money into I’m 1in5, including me.

With unforeseen medical problems and circumstances while on the road in British Columbia, I had to stop and come home to Ontario to care for my physical and mental wellbeing. I can tell everyone I'm not in a good spot in my life right now. The depression I live with is stirring and I am having a hard time after I promised so much to you all. I am discouraged and pained to tell you all that maybe this just isn't time for me to do this.

Many people have offered me help and have had to carry on with their own lives. It’s a big commitment to help someone go across Canada. My purpose was to educate Canadians and raise money to help others. I really just wanted Canadians to know they didn't have to feel alone, and that it's ok to reach out for help in moments of life’s pain. I am reaching out now.

The mental, emotional and physical impact of the tour I started and had to stop has taken its toll on me but helped me to make another difficult decision. There will be no tour this summer. It's with an extremely heavy heart that I make this decision. Feasibly it just won't work this year.

Building something like this takes a ton of time with many, many volunteers. It also takes sponsors, donations, and funding. It has to be coordinated and we need more time to put that together. A lot of well-meaning people had to pull back too.

It was extremely hard to come to this decision and accept it; to make this choice. I'm going to need to step back from the advocacy, education and awareness for a period of time so I can be stronger. I still strongly believe in #StrengthFromPain. I am strong in my commitment to sobriety. I need some time to rebuild my life and get focused.

Not every day is great, some days down right suck. Some days we need to step back for personal safety. Today I have to look after my physical, emotional, and mental wellbeing so that I have a tomorrow. I thank you all for the tremendous amount of support. I am “1in5”.

Eternally grateful; Paulie

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